When I was a young person, in high school, I found journalism. I was a print reporter in high school and college. But I leaned into independent journalism in college. I found regular print reporting to be stodgy, unless it was investigative.

After college when I was voice deep into broadcasting, an occasional investigative story would captivate my imagination. I produced a series in the early aughts about superfund sites in Montana. I heard about one in Butte, but I didn’t know much about it, or much about superfund sites at all, if I’m being totally honest. So, I wanted to learn. And it was not good. Superfund sites are where dangerous things have happened, toxic chemicals turning dirt into sinkholes and humans into victims of cancer and respiratory disease.

I did another series about drugs in schools. I went and spoke to resource officers at a couple of high schools in Missoula, and it was worse than my mommy imagination could handle. I was no angel in my high school days, don’t get me wrong, but I was in control of my own destiny. Not being able to control my children’s destiny is a whole other terrifying reality.

Back in the day, my dream was to be a war correspondent. Think Christiane Amanpour from the golden age of CNN. I would watch her reports from near and far and be drawn into the fantastical romance of it all. I watched the “Scud Stud”, Arthur Kent, during Bush 1’s war in Iraq, Katie Couric in New York City rising to prominence reporting on that war, and more recently, I am still drawn in when I see Richard Engel or Jacob Soboroff.

In 2020 I felt the missed TV opportunity, when COVID hit, but I also feel I likely dodged a bullet by being out there in a war-torn country in the middle of sheer chaos, and violence. That’s a hard pass for this yogi.

Starting my company out of the basic need to find work was a way to be with my young family and still have a career I loved. Since I only anchor local news right now, that feels like such a gift. There’s a war. But I’m not in it. And knowing my kids are above the age to be drafted is not lost on me, because they are not in it.

I am worried about the future, like many others, wondering what happens next? We can bury our heads and not pay attention or pay attention and wonder what’s what. The various cable news outlets are changing, or, dare I say, consolidating.

I’m reading or watching foreign journalists who are reporting wildly different stories than are being fed to us. 

So, what’s what?